Friends?
A lot of people don't seem to understand what a friend is. I find that when I'm in a good mood, when I'm most fun to be around, people want to hang out with me and talk to me. But as soon as something goes wrong, as soon as I'm upset and things don't go right, it's as if these same people -- these people who call themselves my friends-- back off. I mean, they're there when you need them, but only when it's convenient for them. A friend isn't just someone you walk away from when they become an inconvenience to you. That's what I most don't understand about this culture. Or course, I grew up in this country, but my family and friends have actually had the most influence on me. I didn't grow up holding the same values as the people at my school. To them it's as if anyone you talk to on a regular basis is a friend. I don't see how that even works. With a relationship as serious as a friendship there should be a certain level of intimacy. A friend is a ally, not just the person you trust with your secrets-- but with your life. When a friend hurts, you feel that hurt. You don't just comfort, you join her in her pain. A friendship is sincere. There's nothing fake about it, it's raw feeling and emotion. Raw people. There are no manners, no kindness-- unless it's genuine. This is what I don't understand.
posted by The Deceiver at 1:45 PM
7 Comments:
First off that’s a cool picture, looks like the Sun. Anyways it wood seem you have a Butter-Cream Gang view of friendship; you have a high expectation of those you would call friends and I would assume you offer the same in return. Now I’m not an expert(voted most hated in class poll) because I demand a lot from a friend and due my best to reply in kind. As a matter of fact there is only one person I ever applied that term to; her name is Barbara and she was an exchange student who lived with my family(she was in my sister’s class) for the school year. She always went out of her way to be nice(something that’s not normal over here) and she took an interest in my writing(when I used to) which was a first. There was(sorry I won't post it here, interesting story though) needless to say she was my only friend, she always watched Buffy(TV Show)with me and she loved that show. After my sister’s graduation she had to return to her home, and saying goodbye to her was 1 of the 3 hardest thing I ever had to do. I hated it, it’s not fair to make a friend only to have them leave and I was mad for the longest time. After a few years I realized something… There are some people you’re only meant to know for a certain period of time in your life. That time may be long or short but in the end it really doesn’t matter, If somebody makes that kind of impact in your life it’s always there and nothing can ever change it. I could go on but I won’t for now. I think my Mom might have her parent’s address, I’ll have to call to get it.
TheJDman
That’s 1 thing that’s great about living at this point in history, nobody is more than an Email, Letter, or Call away.
lots of valid points. and beautiful photograph. i like the last sentence about definition and i was touched by your expression of "...raw feeling and emotion. raw people."
i laughed at the part about a friend being an ally. true. but what a communist thing to say!
(that was my initial thought)
Ha ha. And I already changed it from "comrade".
Yo, M.
Haven't talked with you on the phone in a looong time.
I've spent all morning with schoolwork and this delightful trend will continue throughout the day (and week I suppose, and month come to think of it). This is as I have 6 speeches due to write and deliver this month, several essays (estimated at about 10 or so at this point), not to speak of the final exams and other considerations. Yesterday I was at States for Tae Kwon Do, won all first places (hurray! hurray!)...haha... and Maria, I am no longer white.
I have completed 3 of my 4 AP exams... I have one more session of this three-hour+ torture on Tuesday...
This is all not to brag nor complain, but to present a not-so-convincing argument for the fact that I haven't called, as you well knew or suspected. As soon as I am not under academic torture's direct influence, I shall call immediatamente and then our 10-hour conversation cycles will resume anew. The only thing that could go wrong is that my school will realize or decide or some such beautiful conclusion that I am not fit or on track for graduation... or you will deem me boring and stupid and we will have to part until that condition has been fully rectified.
I hope all went as well as could be expected with the piece on dramatic irony in R+J...
Much love, Alisa
I just received an email and was so informed about insensitive content on this Blog, I am sorry for my insensitivity and will be more thoughful in future posts.
the JDman
EXIT 93
hi masha
your site is very beautiful thanks iwill read alisa story that she sent me ok bye
Ok, now that I look back at it, this entry was probably pretty dumb. I was feeling pretty strongly about something at the time. Ultimately, a friend is probably one who just loves you.
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